Let's see how it works...

with photos!

A Shala photo shoot picture:

Today

I’m testing out a new way of blogging.

Goodbye, my dear friend

Today we are putting our dear friend, Appie, to sleep. I have had her since she was very tiny, able to fit into the palm of my hand. She is very old and very tired and her life has become so narrowed and difficult for her. She tells us with her eyes she would really like it if we would let her go. She had been waiting patiently till we were ready. 

We love you, Appie:

 

Picture of Mila

So Erin can see how much Mila looks like the dog in her picture. Maybe not so easy to see unless I had a shot of Mila's face up close:

Erin's Song

Here is a little song that reminds me of my dear friend, Erin Claire...

Okay, so this stupid thing isn't working and I can't get it to load directly, so here's a link to the song...sorry about that

Click HERE for the song!!!

I miss Erin Claire, but I love looking at her blog (click here to see). I have her bike so I know she'll have to come back to get it. It's a cold, gloomy day here in Portland. We just got back from a fun visit in Indianapolis where it was 90 degrees and humid. Quite a shock.  John has a cold.  I have the blues.  I'm working on my book on indifference, feeling very inspired by my trip to do so.  

John and I discussed selling our house in a year and being free to move and live wherever we want.  Invest the proceeds and have mobile lifestyles and ways of making an income.  Thus, the new inspiration to get the book written and to get on with my work!  John said he was inspired by my dear friend Erin Claire. Our dear friend.  Who gave away almost all of her belongings, save the few things we are storing for her, packed her suitcase and went to spend time with her father in Louisiana.  It awoke something in John, a desire to be free, unattached in a healthy way.  He wants to do humanitarian work with the rest of his life. I want to write about indifference and other things we don't want to look at but must if we are to evolve. We need to be free to do these things.  Who says we are supposed to own a house and stay rooted in one place? Portland has been good to us, good for us.  It was good for us to be rooted for a while.  But now, my own innate desire to be open and free is reasserting itself and, to my good fortune, I am married to someone with the same nature.  

I will be sad to sell my home. It's quite adorable and I love my garden that I created and the stone retaining walls I built and the fence we had put in and my nandina.  It's the only home I've ever owned. But do we really 'own' such things.  We pay to stay in them for a time, but they were there before, housing someone else's family, and they will remain long after we are gone.  Do we own the ground they are built on?  Who can own the earth, any more than own the sky?  We borrow such things for a time and then we leave them, one way or another.   

I'll post pix from Indy as soon as I get home.  That's all for now...

Well, I've been back a few weeks now, but I'm not sure all of me is here just yet. Most of me. I still find myself back in Vienna for a moment, sitting on the floor, listening to Zhander talk about the yoga.  There is a comfort in the speaking that I miss, something that is taking place that feeds me at a very deep level.  Of course, as always, the challenge is always bringing that 'something' back home and integrating it into my life.  And I am finding that to indeed be a challenge.  It would be so easy without all the distractions of an engaged life.  I lived for a long, long while with very minimal engagement, and had the luxury of few attachments to distract me from my own, inner work.  But I changed that, knowing that is not what I came here to do.  I felt the shift and opened myself to it, and now I face what most face who open themselves to 'the world' and all of its volatility.  

Harder to integrate this way. More stressors, more things to set me spinning. Of course I know there is absolutely no difference, being engaged, not being engaged. Same me, same Self, just requiring a more disciplined mind.

So I ate some chocolate-covered brown rice puffy things that gave me a huge migraine. Missed practice. Feel like crap. Big headache centered just above my left eye.  

John and I joined others at the Shala where I practice for a night of bowling.  John bowled 161!!! Can you believe?  I bowled 93, which for me was very good, since I haven't bowled since I was 12!  I didn't like the gutter balls at all and was quite pouty when I made them.  But I was very happy when I hit strikes and spares.  I like them much, much better.

Here's a picture of us.  Yes, those where my onion rings and I ate almost ALL of them: